We're F*ck Ups

A prompt entitled; the night before graduation

The sun was finally setting. The heat was going down for the day and little starts are beginning to appear. though rays of pink and orange still linger in the sky. Truthfully this was a scene of beauty. On the night right before graduation this simple scenery is paradise, too bad it wont last for more than a couple of hours.
There's no more time left in this chapter. No the story doesn't end here, there is still plenty of time left for our tales. Sadly though this chapter in our lives is coming to an end. I hated it, I hate it. I didn't want to let it go, i didn't want to give this part of my life up. I wish I could slow down the tempo, change courses. Funny how life doesn't give you that choice.
I sat on my balcony, over looking the town on this very anxious night. A big cliche I'll admit it, but when you need a moment to yourself and you have the beauty of your small home town slowly begin to glow as the night falls upon it, just cant help and stare. Over the stonewall on the left side of town, a little forest begins. Then on the opposite side the city starts, and here I am. Right in the middle, stuck. I feel trapped, mentally confined and yet I'm being pushed into all sorts of specific directions that I don't want to be put into. School, college, even society want you to pick your life story now before you even start living it! Everyone wants you to know now and how you're going to live your life. The fact that this is okay, expected and accepted is what is crazy to me. That is obscene! Honestly, why though?
Why would we expect young, dumb kids to make a huge decision that could lead to a big fuck up. maybe it adults who are fuck ups who don't know anything. They blame whats wrong on those who are still knew to the world and don't know what to do with the world. then those kids become fucked up adults. and bam, the cycle repeats 
Taking a deep breath and then slowly letting it back out, I bring the can back up to my lips. It's a cheap margarita can, artificially flavored, and the only six pack i could find under my mom's bed. This time. 
"Fuck everything."
"I second that." 
With all strength  had in my body I managed to keep my balance on the balcony and not fall off. 
"The fuck Danny! You scared the shit out of me!"
No longer alone here, I stared at my annoying, smirking ass neighbor. He's got a cute face and sex messy bed hair look but all I can think about right now is how I want to strangle that little neck of his. Well that and how his eyes look really pretty under this lighting. 
"Sorry Lace,  I didn't think you startled so easily." He laughs.
Ass.
I roll my eyes and keep quiet, while occasionally taking small sips from my can. I see him eyes the other cans and sigh shrugging, making a face that reads, "if you want one ask you idiot" he does.
He smiles as he takes a good chug, wiping away any drips from his chin he sighs satisfied. "Thanks for that,' he states, Watermelon, my favorite."
I know.
"You're scared."
he stated that comment, because he knew. He somehow managed to read that off me while no one else seemed to be able. I thought it was clear as daylight, but turns out I'm better at hiding than I thought I was.
But the little chuckles that escape his mouth have me raising an eyebrow.
"I don't get why though. You're staying here, nothings changing, you still get to live the same life. Community college is basically a step from what this year was in high-school. You don't have to worry about the unknown and having to start all over all on your own."
"Wow, that's harsh. No, better yet that's fucked up."
"Lace I'm sorry but it's the truth. Here's my life. New school, new city, miles away and piles of loans. I won't know anyone and I have no idea how I'm going to do it! There it is, plain and simple."
You know that metaphor of the rubber-band? The one where ts being pulled and stretched to the point where it just snaps.Well snap it did. 
"You're an Ass."
"Lace-"
"No,"  I wasn't going to take it, 'You're a fucking asshole! You're sitting here complaining to me about your problems, which is fine! I get it we all need a little time to just rant and yell and bitch! But who the fuck are you to degrade my problems to yours?! Did you not here what you said, community college! I have no idea what I'm going to do with my life, no plans no inspiration! Meanwhile you're going to fucking Brown, full ride to study the dream you've had since you were a little freaking third grade, A-class nerd!"
I snapped, big time. 
"At least you have something going in your life. I get that you're scared, its complete change. But you have something. Me, no. I'm not a genius like you, or a star athlete. Definitely not an amazing artist.  I'm terrified, I'm going to end up as some big fuck up and everyone surely knows it. I'm just hoping I won't come to the day when I believe it, at least completely. "
"I'm sorry. I guess you can sy we're equally as scared and just want to scream and yell at someone." 
For the first time I smile tonight, I grab his chin and force his stare into mine, 
"Listen here Danny Boy, you're a fucked up golden boy nerd with too much to loose. I'm a fucked up weirdo with no where to go. We're somewhat friends who are in the same position now and will be in the same position with a thousand other kids tomorrow at that ceremony. Lets do two things, one, let's not be fuck ups tomorrow. I think we deserve that much. Two, Let's try to enjoy these last few moments."
He laughs, I laugh. 
"Is this the part where we kiss now ?" He whispers
"What? No, that wasn't what, I didn't intend to do that or have you believe that we. . .  That we were gonna kiss "
"Right, right that would be weird. Duh, ha yeah I wasn't thinking." 
"Yeah it's fine, cool." 
"Cool." 
More margarita sips and awkward silences. I finish my can and toss it in the box, I lightly tap the railing, keeping my eyes on the stars. 
They're really pretty. 
"You know, " I breathe deeply, "Maybe after you have to give that big closing speech tomorrow, maybe . . . you could kiss, me. It could like one of those big Hollywood cliches. I mean we can't get anymore cliche than now."
He laughs shaking his head, "Maybe?"
I nod reaching for another can. 
"Maybe."